On the Occassion of My last Afternoon by Kaye Gibbons

On the Occassion of My last Afternoon by Kaye Gibbons. 1998. New York: G. P. Putnam's Sons. 273 pp.

Emma Garnet Tate, raised on a James River plantation in Virginia before the Civil War, recollects her past, as her life comes to an end, in Kaye Gibbons' fifth novel. Gibbons, a native of North Carolina, has received numerous awards for her writing. However, I did not find this particular novel to be worthy of any awards.

Emma begins her narration with an episode of her father's cruelty inflicted on one of his slaves. At the time she is but twelve years old, "I do not know what to make of this now, because I am too young." is her reaction to her father's "accidental" killing of a "nigger".
Yet, Emma knows it was no accident. Even at her young age, she knows her father is a liar.

The reader learns early on that Emma’s father has a deep dark secret shared only by Clarice a servant that has been with Mr. Tate since he was eight years old. Clarice is not
a slave, she is a free Negro that made the choice to raise Mr. Tate after she was witness to
the horrific secret of his past. She is the only one who has any kind of influence over Mr. Tate, a tyrannical, self-made man, the type of man who became the worst stereotype of the Southern man of his times. He has wealth and a certain degree of power, but does not have the respect of his neighbors or his family. Tate is a bully not only to his slaves, but also to his family. He feels his son Whately does not fully appreciate the accomplishments of his father and that he takes for granted his privileges of higher education and social standing. Mr. Tate's nightly tirades often send his poor fragile wife to her room with terrible headaches.

Emma grows up sympathetic to the plight of those around her. She often saves her mother from her father nights she hears her mother crying from the bedroom, feigning some excuse, such as a younger sibling's fever, to release her mother from her father’s rage. She idolizes her older brother Whately for his kindness to her in allowing her the use of his books, which give her as a girl the give of literature not available to many young ladies of her time. She feels superior to her younger sister Maureen, who she sees as a Daddy’s girl, with no real substance. Her other younger brothers are only mentioned briefly here and there. She spends most of her time in the company of Clarice and develops early on, much to her father’s disliking, a sense that slavery is wrong and that the Negroes should be treated more humanely.

As the memories progress, Emma relates the love of her husband, a “Yankee” doctor, from a very prominent Boston family. Emma leaves her mother, to follow her husband to North Carolina, promising to return for her and save her from the evil Mr. Tate. However, Emma never does return for her mother, leaving her with a lifetime of guilt and regret. Emma has a picturesque life with her adoring husband and beautiful daughters, until the start of the war, when Quincy, Emma’s adoring husband, takes up running a Confederate hospital in Raleigh, North Carolina. Emma is then immersed in a world of blood, gore, suffering and loss. She spends her days at her husband’s hospital, nursing the wounded and dying Confederate soldiers, who are fighting for a cause that she, herself, disagrees with.

While Gibbon’s writing has eloquence and a sense of literary style, I became bored with the story less than halfway through. I found Emma to be a bit whiny and self-absorbed. Her character at times was hypocritical of her beliefs. Upon moving to Raleigh, her husband buys the freedom of three Negroes, only to use them as paid servants in their household, while witholding from them the knowledge of their freedom. So, I say, where was the freedom? Does paying them for their services make up for their inability to choose to stay or go?

Near the end of the novel, the reader learns Mr. Tate’s secret, but it leaves one wondering why the wise Clarice did not have a more positive impact on the youth she rescued. How, with all her guidance and influence, did he become the monster Emma portrays in her reminisces? And even with the knowledge of her father’s secret and his death, there is never a sense of forgiveness for his sins. In the last paragraph of the book Emma states, “On the occasion of my last afternoon, I feel no sorrow, feel no regret…”, but this is not the feeling the reader is left with at the end of the story. I felt disappointed that her character never rose above the hatred of her father or the guilt of her mother. I felt while she admitted to a wonderful life with her adoring husband, beautiful children and more money than she would ever need, she simply pitied herself and made herself out to be the a martyr in a cruel world, but in reality every other character in the story had a much harder life than she did.

The fact is no matter how bad most of us may feel our lives to be at any given time, I can almost guarantee that at any given moment, there is someone else on this earth that is experiencing pain and hardship that can only be imagined with horror. Keep in mind, no matter how awful you think your life may be, there is always someone in the world who is worse off, so be thankful for the good, do not hold anyone else accountable for your miseries, take responsibility for yourself and your situation, as you are the only one who can change it and self-pity gets you nowhere.